Friday, 21 May 2010
Oooh! It's nearly time!
There's a festival on the curry mile and there's music and fun to be had! Hang on. What's this? Just how many Manclichés are there? Lets see: Ian Brown of The Stone Roses (CHECK!); Sumner playing with Bad Lieutenant formerly of Joy Division and New Order (CHECK!); Peter Hook (CHECK!); Mike Pickering and Justin Robertson of Hacienda fame (CHECK!); A Certain Ratio, who were signed to Factory (CHECK!); Mr Scruff of Eastern Bloc P45 (CHECK!).
We wouldn't be surprised if Clint Boon is the master of ceremonies on the day as well!
It is obvious that Manchester could be improved greatly by dropping a slab of concrete the exact width and breadth of Platt Fields on Friday 11th of June. We'll have to sacrifice some ducks in that boating lake thing, but in war, innocents will always die.
That, or we can simply thrill at the fact that everywhere else in Manchester on the night won't be filled with pot-bellied fortysomethings requesting 'Step On' as they'll all be reliving imagined glory years when UNKLE finally take to the stage to play the hip-hop equivalent of watery yoghurt.
Seriously though, if you are going, don't forget to make up alternative lyrics for that simian twat's 'F.E.A.R.' like "Formulaic egocentric ape rocker, fellating everyone after Reading96." And take sun-cream.
(Our tips: Catch Unabombers / Krysko / Now Wave and El Diablos, then get the fuck out of there)